Saturday, February 13, 2010

July 6-13, Africa, The story continues about visas, Email to Duane

As our wait continued to receive news that our I-600 was renewed and approved by homeland security, time passed. Might I add that it passed very slowly! We could not book plane tickets because of the uncertainty of it all. But we were hoping soon that it would all come together.
An email I sent Duane on July 8th:

Hey honey . Thanks for all you are doing. I had this feeling to call and make an appointment at the embassy for Monday the 13th or Tuesday the 14th. hoping that everything would be there by Friday or Monday. Then we might could fly out on Sunday the 19th and arrive home on Andrew's birthday the 20th. If the stuff would come in by this Monday we could possibly fly out on Thursday the 16th.
I am feeling much better today. I lay in bed last night just miserable and prayed to God.
"Heal Me, oh God and I will be healed, save me and I will be saved, For you alone are my praise" , out of Jeremiah, I then continued, Ok, I am going to lay here in my bed and let your healing power wash over me, I have taken all these medicines and they are not working very well, I need you to heal me, just like the woman who knew if she touched you she would be healed, I want to touch you and be healed. I believe you will heal me. I cannot fight these sick demons, I am too weak, fight for me, Father, I do not want to go to the doc tomorrow. So here I am."
I lay there soaking and giving God praise for who he was with Kimberly and Alberto playing and guess what? Very briefly he let me see him, in a picture, conquering my sickness.

He was a VERY BIG MAN whose outline was in Gold, facial features, everything, like a golden statue come to life. I mean he was massive! He towered way up there! He was upset like the kind of upset you see in a parent's eyes when someone is messing with their kid. And He bent down and picked up this massive gold flame sword and came straight down on something/somebody with a vengence! End of vision.
I noticed a little later that I was breathing better and felt washed over. I fell asleep. This morning, I woke up feeling like I had energy and was breathing better after I coughed up some gunk. I even went to town to day. It wore me out but I am feeling so much better. That sick is gone and now the after effects on my body are healing. I have coughed today but nothing like before. I can breathe. So I am on the mend.
God is very good.
You know I wish the devil would just give up for a while and learn that God is defending us. We must be doing His will for all this battle to be going on. He(God) has really drawn me into himself to trust and rely on Him and the only time I felt deterred was when S. told me about the 5million shillings. But then I let it go in his hands. I was crying more out of anger than great! now what do we do? Why can't the enemy just leave us be???????????
Is there ever a break when the enemy doesn't bother us or is God teaching us that There IS NEVER a break, but we are unaffected by it when we are hiding in the shelter of his wings? When we thrust ourselves into Him and press against his chest, we cannot feel the effects of the ammunition or the punches of the enemy even though we are aware of them. It all has to do with our focus! That is it! There is constant warfare, but we don't even have to fight it! We just have to bury our head into our Daddy and put our arms around his neck. HE is BIG AND STRONG AND HAS LOTS OF HELPERS with big swords!
On this trip, I have not had the stamina or urge to fight anything but when I have felt crushed or kicked or knocked I have made the choice to say "Daddy, I can't fight, will you do it? Will you rebuke the enemy for me?"
I have been blown away by his faithfulness this whole trip. I wish I could express to the whole world the fulness I feel about my God! But I really find it almost impossible. I want to tell people that He really does LOVE YOU and me!!!!! That if we let Him, he will intervene in the smallest things in our lives because He cares so deeply. He will let us know him! But the intensity I feel just want translate to others unless they want to know it.
Life can be lived deeply in Christ, and even if I never see what I determine by my earthly mind to be a miracle, I am satisfied that I know the Trinity, the three facets of God intimately, Who shows me things and speaks things to me as the lover of my soul. Now His word says, that signs and miracles will follow those who believe and he is always true to His Word, but I realize this, I don't want to be always looking for that fruit, because it will deter my focus. I may never be aware of a miracle that happens because of me but I know they are happening. I probably will always be amazed and full of joy when one happens because I like surprises, but I will not search after them. I always want my ear to be listening to be obedient when He points out someone that needs a miracle. my healing last night was a miracle, the passport deal was a miracle. so I guess they are following. :) i like the little secret miracles, the ones where God doesn't shine a spotlight but you know there has been a change. For example,
You know R.? Well, he is a miracle. And it is because of me being obedient. These adoptions were not just about us.
He came by to visit and told me he needed to talk with me. he said, "You know when you came here last year, I was amazed by you, that you could love these kids like you did. I saw the love you had for them and God worked on my heart long after you had gone. I have two children and I had nothing to do with them. My life before I was born again was very bad and even after I was born again, I did not see any reason to have anything to do with the children I had. But when you came, I asked God, How can she love them when they are not even her own? That is amazing! God told me, "Melissa loves with my love and if she can love those kids, then you can love your two birth children as well with my love. " R. repented and found his kids and started becoming the father he was supposed to be and started spending weekly time with them and it has changed all their lives. He is engaged now to a wonderful christian woman and will be married this coming year!
I was like wow!!!!!!
I also found out, not from Richard, but when he stayed with me in the hospital with Allenni and kept checking on us, he was risking his reputation. A man and woman even walking alone in ugandan culture infers that they are intimate. I guess that is why we got the question several times if he was Allenni's daddy. I think God used Allenni's emergency room visit and stay as an important part of what he showed Richard, because that is where I lost control and cried and prayed over Allenni as she was gasping for air. I had no idea God was showing Richard His love through me. (What is even more interesting is that had been my prayer for Maggie when we were dealing with a lot with her a long time ago and my prayer while I was being tested by Andrew and Allenni last year, "Let me be a vessel of your love poured on them because I cannot love them with this human love."
So anyway, I am not sure why I typed this all to you, maybe it has been in my spirit and I needed to get it out. I guess I need to put this in my journal. I'll print it and tape it in there.
I am glad that before I left, in RL class God showed me that I was trying to be the family's savior. and I repented, because in that mode, I wouldn't have done well this time.! Ha!
In small group and RL gathering at Charolotte's , you all storm DHR and USCIS in prayer!
I love you and miss you.

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